"Why Are Women Intimidated - 20"
By a man who is well hung?! I thought women desired that am I wrong?! I respect, admire and appreciate the women I have been with and treated them better than they could ask for but when it comes to Being Inimate and they find out how large I am it seems as if they shy away from it and don't want it, is this normal? I am a real guy looking for a women who wanted to be treated rift and respected and who like a larger man!! ALL women who are interested need apply! I look forward to hearing from you!! : ) Happy Thanksgiving!!
Dear Hung,I couldn't help but sympathize with your plight after reading your ad. You poor, poor man. All the hardships you must have experienced. All the women turning you down because of your enormous penis. Poor lil guy. But don't worry too much, as a medical professional I am here for you. I might specialize in an entirely different genital section, but I think I can help you anyway.
I thought your questions were quite valid, and I am prepared to help answer these deep curiosities of yours. I hope you don't mind if I address them in list format as I find it is easier for me to formulate my thoughts with bullet points, and I want to make sure I touch on all areas of concern. I would hate for you to have to contact me for follow-up questions because I forgot an important point of your sincere query.
- "I thought women desired that, am I wrong?" - No Hung, you are not wrong. Women often enjoy a well-endowed sexual partner. In fact, many of the women I am acquainted with are fans of the large "Johnson," if you know what I mean. Is yours properly groomed? Any foul odors or odd discharge? I have heard that that often causes women to be less than enthusiastic about a man's equipment. Do you wash your penis regularly? Also, if you have any sores or bumps, those can be a factor in why the women go screaming out of your bedroom.
- "When it comes to Being Inimate and they find out how large I am it seems as if they shy away from it and don't want it, is this normal?" - Once again, Hung, this is not normal. How are you approaching these women with your enormous manhood? (I hope you're not writing them romantic letters because your ad causes my nether-bits to resemble the Sahara, I'm just saying...). Are you making sure they are interested in sex with you or just dropping your pants when they walk up. If that is the case, then it's not really the size of the package that is making them run. And if they are interested, are you making sure they are aroused before you start "impressing" your gargantuan member on them? Personally, I am a huge fan of the above average man, but if the skill it's being wielded with is similar to a Gorilla doing the running man in roller-skates I think I would be running into the arms of an average-yet-skilled lover before you could even begin to unwrap yourself from the tangle of sheets my abrupt departure left you in.
- "I am a real guy looking for a women who wanted to be treated rift and respected and who like a larger man!!" Without even mentioning the whole "treating rift" section (we'll just assume the auto-correct changed that from 'right'), I am glad you clarified that you are a "real man." I was beginning to think that this was being written by an underused, oversized vibrator. If that was the case I would just suggest you woo these women with a gift basket of Astroglide and a romance novel with Fabio on the cover. It could work just as well as any of your approaches seem to be.
- "ALL women who are interested need apply! I look forward to hearing from you!!" Does this mean you are an equal-opportunity, well-endowed respecter of women? Or just that you would like us to line up one-by-one to let us all take a gander and see who doesn't run screaming? I mean, either way might have its prospects...
Anyway Hung, I hope some of these points have helped answer your questions. I could see that you were feeling lost and looking for some friendly advice. If you are really hung up over having just too darned large of a penis you could try a few other things as well. For instance, you could try growing out all of your pubic hair as long and crazy as it can get. Most men say that they like to keep that area trimmed due to it enhancing the appearance of size, this could help you disguise the unsightly enormity that you hide under your pants. You could also ask one of your close friends (preferably a girl in pointy high-heels) to kick you in the nuts repeatedly. This could help you because it would cause your testicles to swell to large proportions thus making your penis insignificant by comparison. Or you could just start binge-drinking and using large amounts of methamphetamine which cause it to be difficult for a man to get and/or sustain an erection therefore making it near impossible for your wang to scare off another wonderful girlfriend. Although, if drugs and alcohol aren't to your liking (or you're one of those that doesn't have that unfortunate consequence from imbibing too much) you could go get the enormous condoms. They're the Trojan Magnum XXLs in the black box. You know the ones I'm talking about, I'm fairly certain you probably don't use those. Nothing will make a penis look smaller than a nice, saggy balloon hanging off of it.
Let me know if you have any further questions I can help you with,
P.S. My consult bill is in the mail